I apologize in advance for the insulting and paternalistic tone of the following post. It is not my usual style for a reason: I believe that people and their concerns deserve respect and that vaccine safety arguments should stand on their merits alone. But unfortunately, not everyone agrees with me. This piece was written mimicking the style and format of a highly inflammatory opinion piece being shared at the moment from scarymommy.com. By imitating Elizabeth Broadbent’s abrasive style, I hope to highlight just how offensive it is to dismiss logical and rational concerns in this manner, while at the same time correcting many of the misconceptions contained in the original.